Hey there, Pizza Boy!

From ABC News: Down But Not Out: From Hedge Funds to Pizza Delivery.

For the first 45 years of Ken Karpman's life, everything was close to perfect.

He graduated from UCLA with a bachelor's degree and M.B.A., then got a high-paying job as an institutional equity sales trader. He married his dream girl, had two children and traveled the world on expensive vacations.

Over the span of Karpman's impressive 20-year career as a trader, he climbed the company ladder, reaching a salary of $750,000 a year.

Karpman was so confident in his good fortune and the strong economy that he left his job in 2005 to start his own hedge fund. To pay for the new business and their standard of living, Karpman quickly burned through $500,000 in savings and, like so many Americans, took a line of credit against his house.

After a lengthy and fruitless job search, the Karpmans were shocked to find themselves in financial dire straits, with zero savings, hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and their home in foreclosure.

Desperate for quick cash, Karpman tried to find a job bartending but came up empty. Finally, he drove his Mercedes to Mike's Pizza & Deli Station in Clearwater and applied for a job. Mike Dodaro, the owner of the pizza shop, said he was shocked when he read his application but he offered him the job despite some reluctance to hire an over-qualified candidate.

Karpman's salary plummeted from six figures to $7.29 an hour -- plus tips -- but it's money that he's grateful to earn.

The Karpmans are now on food stamps and a tight budget.

As Karpman counts every penny he earns, he still hopes he can come back from the financial brink and reclaim a lifestyle he, like so many Americans, never imagined he could lose.

"I need a couple of wins," he said, "and I think that, hopefully, it'll mushroom up like it caved in."

And they still don't fuckin' get it! They think there will be another bubble to bail them out.

Captain of our fairy band,
Helena is here at hand,
And the youth, mistook by me,
Pleading for a lover's fee.
Shall we their fond pageant see?
Lord, what fools these mortals be!